Bethany--Week 3

Well hellloooo Wednesday!  Wow, you came around fast.  I am not gonna lie, this week was HARD!  I have been slammed with emotions and I will be the first to admit I did not make the best choices as a result.  But you know what, today was a new day and I stuck 110% to plan despite some ups and downs in my day and tomorrow is another new day.  In life we're going to have successes and failures.  I hope to turn these failures into successes so that there are many more checks in the "success" column overall!

Plan:  Weight Watchers 360--love it!

Scale:  I was not able to make my normal meeting this week so I'm not sure what the scale would say about me today.  8 or 10 months ago I put up our scales in the house because I was measuring how I felt about myself on a daily basis by what the number on that dang thing said.  Not.worth.it.  I do know that I had a tough week and I'm feeling heavy tonight as I type.  I hope that if I was going to be "up" in terms of the scale today that a solid week of being back on track will get me back down and then some!

Success:  I renewed my gym membership for 2013 AND I signed up for a tap class!  My first class was tonight and while it was a little overwhelming having not danced in 16-17 years, I did enjoy it.  My daughter Jaden and I have big plans to practice our tapping this weekend in our basement and she claims she's going to teach me a few things!  ha!



Dancing was a huge positive in my childhood and I hope that having this class to look forward to each week will put a smile on my face no matter what the week holds.  I also hope to burn some calories and learn some new steps!

Fail:  I failed this week in that I succumbed to emotional eating.  When I talk about emotional eating, I don't mean that I got upset about something, so I ate an entire bag of chips.  However, I faced a difficult situation this week and got caught up in it instead of focusing on me, my goals and my health.  I went through a drive through on Tuesday instead of packing lunches which would have been just as easy, if not easier!  But that morning I was in the middle of a conflict, dealing with my crying 22-month-old and trying to do too many things at once.  I took my kiddos to Columbus for the weekend and instead of watching what I ate at all, I went overboard. 


If you reading this have any suggestions as far as eating while traveling or have had success transferring emotion to doing something positive such as taking a walk instead of eating a soft pretzel, I would love to hear from you!  I struggle with both, and when I take my girls to Columbus I almost always in some way enter a tremendously stressful situation (of which I cannot sort through details fairly right now), so the combination of being away from home + stress = failure.


One good thing:  I don't go to Columbus very often!  ha!

Burning:  I burned some calories today at my tap class, though I'm not really sure of how many.  According to weight watchers, I earned 3 activity points--woohoo!  Better than the zero I've been earning the past few weeks.  I did not have a chance to set up my active link through weight watchers, but it's a priority for this week, as is getting to my gym 4 times before I write my next post here!

Getting There: I wish that I could delve into some personal stuff tonight, but it just doesn't feel right.  I'll put it this way--I had a tough childhood.  Not nearly as tough as some, but tough.  It has followed me into adulthood.  I'm a wounded, yet healing young woman and sometimes the wounds open up.  I'm plagued with not feeling like I'm "enough" due to the way I've been treated since my parents divorced 28 years ago.  It impacts every single facet of my life regardless of how much I try to prevent it from doing so.  The worst part about this entire situation is that the person who has played the biggest part in this downright refuses to see how they have treated me and how they have made me feel.  And worse yet, they continue.  I cannot say anymore right now--I've probably said too much as it is.  But maybe down the road I can tactfully delve deeper into some of this.  I know without a shadow of a doubt, especially after carefully taking note of my own stress level and emotional eating this past weekend anticipating, during the stress and afterwards, that this has a major impact on my health and weight journey.  In fact, I think I'm fortunate to sit here tonight only 15 lbs above where I think I should be and not 150 lbs!

Baby Step:  My baby step this week is to hit the gym 4 times!

Big Picture:  I still want to lose 15 lbs.  Even more than losing pounds, I would like to treat myself and my body with the love and respect it deserves daily.  I would like to make time for myself and my needs before other less important things.  I want to unlock the puzzle of emotions and eating as it pertains to me!

Thank you for joining me for week 3 of the journey.  Here's to a good week for all, and may we reconnect again next week with lots of positives and successes!