Showing posts with label Piper. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Piper. Show all posts
Tuesday, February 19, 2013
Piper: Week 5
For the next 2 weeks I will not be blogging my diet/weight/exercise. On Monday I had abdominal surgery and can not exercise or really do much of anything until I see my dr in 2 weeks. It's gonna be a LONG two weeks....I am a very active person and have a hard time sitting still. I am praying that I do not gain back all the weight I have lost since I can't do much. But if I do ...that's ok to...I'll just get back to hard work and lose it again ! See you next week with a update !!
Tuesday, February 12, 2013
Piper ( Week 4)
Eating Plan: none (divorce diet)
Goal: 145 lbs
Weekly Weight Loss: 4.7 lbs
Total Weight Loss: 7.4 lbs
Weekly Exercise: none
It's been a rough week....:( Part of my severe anxiety issues are due to the fact that my husband and I are getting a divorce. Not something I ever thought would happen to me. It's not some exciting juicy story either....we just simply do not get along !! It's like we woke up and realized we were married to strangers....drifting in opposite directions !! All I can say is that we do not have a emotionally healthy marriage. On Monday night a family adopted our dog. We did this knowing that we wouldn't be able to care for him properly in smaller homes and working full time. I have been crying ever since....I'm am a emotional wreck. I'm not sure if its cause I miss him or that it's the first step to what I know will be one of the hardest choices I make in my life !! I couldn't be more scared...:( But sometimes fear is good....
The weight loss I had this week is what I call the "divorce diet" ...which sounds good but is really unhealthy. I never understood how people could lose weight over emotional stressors as I tend to be a emotional eater but when it gets bad enough you don't want to eat...nothing tastes good :( I did not work out one time this week.....no excuse but that I just couldn't. My appointment with Dr. B was on tues....he has been helping me through this........not sure I could do this without his support !! Hopefully my next week will be a happier one... Although I lost weight and I should be excited...this is not the right way to do it !!
Wednesday, February 6, 2013
Piper (Week 3)
Eating Plan: 1300 a day calorie count via My fitness pal app (as of yesterday) and adding parts of the Cinch Diet plan (Cynthia SASS).
Goal: 145 lbs
Weekly Weight Loss: 2.4 lbs
Total Weight Loss: .4 lb (since I gained 2 lbs while initially starting)
Weekly Exercise: Insanity videos and Yoga Fusion
Weekly Exercise: Insanity videos and Yoga Fusion
Wow !! So I weighed 163.6 lbs this am !! I started off weighing 164 lbs but then gained and was at 166 lbs last week. My hard work has paid off and it feels GOOD :)
Yesterday was my third week seeing Dr. B ( my therapist). He has been extremely helpful in reducing some of my anxiety or at least recogninzing my issues and things I have to change so that eventually I can cope. Not sure how much that is helping me with my weight control right now but I am hopeful. I am reading two books that you may want to try. One is called Discovering your personality type by Rizo and Hudson. It's about enneagram ( something new to me) and I have a type 9 which means I am typically a peaceful person put can also be a perfectionist at times. It's very interesting. The other book I am reading is called May Cause Miracles by Gabrielle Bernstein. It's a 40 day guide book of subtle shifts for radical change and unlimited happiness. So far this has also been a great book and worth the read.
I only worked out 3 days this week. I took a yoga fusion class on Monday and then did Insanity tue and will do it today. I work for 12 hrs every Thursday so that is really not a day I can work out and typically work 9 hrs plus commute which makes for a long Friday. I have no excuse for sat and Sunday only that I am alone with my boys most weekends and try and spend as much time with them that I can. I really need to be working out on the weekends though so I can make 5 work outs per week.
I'm looking forward to the challenges that face me this next week ! See you next Wednesday !!
Wednesday, January 30, 2013
Piper (Week 2)
Eating Plan: 1300 a day calorie count via My fitness pal app (as of yesterday)
Goal: 145 lbs
Weekly Weight Loss: gained 2 pounds
Total Weight Loss: none so far
Weekly Exercise: 2 days of Insanity Video- so about 30 min. per day.
So..... obviously my great idea of just "watching" what I eat backfired on me ! So I decided to go back to counting calories and leave one meal a week where I can eat whatever I want to eat! As of today I weigh 166 lbs which is 2 lbs up from last week. I am pretty unhappy with this although I have no one to blame but ME. I am not a big chef so I really don't have any good recipes to put on here. I also cook for me and my family separately as we tend to eat different things. This can make it harder. I have to admit that my muscles ache today from yesterday's insanity video. I am taking a yoga fusion class tomorrow. If you have never taken one they are amazing. Few places/people teach yoga fusion so check your local yoga studios. You can burn up to 1200-1500 calories per class. I am also going to my therapist tomorrow to help me deal with my anxiety issues. As I have stated before I gained 20 something lbs being on Cymbalta and I am trying to avoid going back on that med. I did start taking Buspar which is supposed to not have as may side effects. Although I was VERY reluctant to do this the pics below are of me from yesterday. When I saw them I was shocked !! I couldn't believe what a skewed view I had of how I looked physically. I just tried to not look in the mirror and cover up with cloths. Well....not any more !! I will be posting pics periodically so I can see my progress. Hope everyone has a great week !! XOXO
Weekly Exercise: 2 days of Insanity Video- so about 30 min. per day.
So..... obviously my great idea of just "watching" what I eat backfired on me ! So I decided to go back to counting calories and leave one meal a week where I can eat whatever I want to eat! As of today I weigh 166 lbs which is 2 lbs up from last week. I am pretty unhappy with this although I have no one to blame but ME. I am not a big chef so I really don't have any good recipes to put on here. I also cook for me and my family separately as we tend to eat different things. This can make it harder. I have to admit that my muscles ache today from yesterday's insanity video. I am taking a yoga fusion class tomorrow. If you have never taken one they are amazing. Few places/people teach yoga fusion so check your local yoga studios. You can burn up to 1200-1500 calories per class. I am also going to my therapist tomorrow to help me deal with my anxiety issues. As I have stated before I gained 20 something lbs being on Cymbalta and I am trying to avoid going back on that med. I did start taking Buspar which is supposed to not have as may side effects. Although I was VERY reluctant to do this the pics below are of me from yesterday. When I saw them I was shocked !! I couldn't believe what a skewed view I had of how I looked physically. I just tried to not look in the mirror and cover up with cloths. Well....not any more !! I will be posting pics periodically so I can see my progress. Hope everyone has a great week !! XOXO
Wednesday, January 23, 2013
Piper (Week 1)
Hi everyone,
This is my first experience blogging so it may take me a while to get the hang of it. I am definitely the type of person who doesn't like to talk about herself or private life......and that's only was because I didn't think any one would really care enough to read. I couldn't imagine why people would blog about their lives. Pretty negative and pathetic , huh ?? Then I realized that it really doesn't matter because if my story can influence or make a positive connection with just one person then I am doing this for the right reasons. The most important thing is to be true to myself !! Everyone has a story and here is mine.....
So here it goes........ I am a 37 year old mom of 2 boys ages 10 and 7. I work as a pediatric nurse part time. I decided to join this group because I wanted to connect with others and learn from each others experiences as well as be accountable for my own actions. I feel like to truly know me you need to know my back ground. Bare with my improper grammar, typos, etc.....my job doesn't call for that kinda stuff..........this has actually been the first time I have been able to put this in writing and to tell you the truth it scares the shit out of me. I have always been worried about what others think of me or if they truly knew me they would not want to be friends etc, etc ......pretty much MAJOR self esteem issues...and I am def getting too old for this type of thinking ...topics for later posts ;)
I grew up in northeast N.J. ( jersey girl forever) in primarily a single family home with my mom and younger sister. I was very lucky to never have struggled with weight until after having kids. I was very athletic playing field hockey and lacrosse in high school. My senior year of high school I was about 5'9 and 128 lbs. I also have struggled with severe anxiety/self esteem issues most of my life. It has been debilitating at times and peaked my senior year.
After 2 hospitalizations for anxiety my senior year (back then I was told it was depression) I was put on Effexor. It did help but did increase my weight. Now at that time I might of gained 5 lbs which looking back is nothing !! This was the beginning of my introduction to SSRI's (anti depressants) and the effect they can have on your weight.
I ended up moving to Miami where my dad and step mom live to go to a community college. Not sure anyone knew what to do with me. I had no goals and basically didn't even know who "I" truly was. I failed miserably at school and ended up in Cleveland, Ohio where my mom moved in the mean time ( she is from the Cleveland area). I went to a community college and got a associates degree after many years. Then some how I got the self esteem to apply to a 4 year school thinking nursing would be a good career for me. I graduated with my BSN during which I had my first son and got married. I was about 28 years old.
My first son was born in Feb 2002 when I was 26. I gained 45 lbs during my first pregnancy. Although I had gotten married at the justice of the peace in Dec. 2001 my "true"wedding was in June of 2002. This was the first time I had EVER needed to lose weight. I lost all of my weight in 4 months weighing 133 lbs during my wedding. I also had terrible post part anxiety. I should be proud that when I look at my wedding pics I see this skinny beautiful bride. I am not proud. I spent 4 months losing all that weight for every one but ME !! I cared so much about what everyone else thought or would think about me that I was pretty much miserable and not enjoying the first few precious months of my sons life. My identity had always been based on my looks.
This began the battle with food and using it as a emotional clutch. I gained the same amount of weight with my second son in 2005 and lost all of my weight again (not for the right reasons) in about 8 months. Although I was skinny I was still not happy.
I could go on and on as I have lost the same 10-20 lbs over and over. I just recently gained 25 lbs being on Cymbalta. As of today I weigh 164 lbs which for ME is heavy. Everyone has THEIR number and looks different on everyone. I have done weight watchers, the cinch diet, Jenny Craig's etc etc.....I am sick of counting numbers or carbs vs protein and I just want to focus on fixing what I feel is the real problem for me. So right now I am watching what I eat...no number counting etc. and only eating when I am hungry. I did purchase the insanity videos ( my treadmill just broke) which should be arriving soon and I will be doing those and I love taking a yoga fusion class if i have the time. I have also committed to going to therapy weekly. I am hoping by fixing my anxiety issues and self esteem issues it will help with my emotional eating and my "hunger" for true happiness . Although my "number" goal is to be 145 lbs. My true goal is to love my self/life again and be the best mom I can be to the two most precious boys in my life !! Looking forward to sharing my journey with you .......
Piper
This is my first experience blogging so it may take me a while to get the hang of it. I am definitely the type of person who doesn't like to talk about herself or private life......and that's only was because I didn't think any one would really care enough to read. I couldn't imagine why people would blog about their lives. Pretty negative and pathetic , huh ?? Then I realized that it really doesn't matter because if my story can influence or make a positive connection with just one person then I am doing this for the right reasons. The most important thing is to be true to myself !! Everyone has a story and here is mine.....
So here it goes........ I am a 37 year old mom of 2 boys ages 10 and 7. I work as a pediatric nurse part time. I decided to join this group because I wanted to connect with others and learn from each others experiences as well as be accountable for my own actions. I feel like to truly know me you need to know my back ground. Bare with my improper grammar, typos, etc.....my job doesn't call for that kinda stuff..........this has actually been the first time I have been able to put this in writing and to tell you the truth it scares the shit out of me. I have always been worried about what others think of me or if they truly knew me they would not want to be friends etc, etc ......pretty much MAJOR self esteem issues...and I am def getting too old for this type of thinking ...topics for later posts ;)
I grew up in northeast N.J. ( jersey girl forever) in primarily a single family home with my mom and younger sister. I was very lucky to never have struggled with weight until after having kids. I was very athletic playing field hockey and lacrosse in high school. My senior year of high school I was about 5'9 and 128 lbs. I also have struggled with severe anxiety/self esteem issues most of my life. It has been debilitating at times and peaked my senior year.
After 2 hospitalizations for anxiety my senior year (back then I was told it was depression) I was put on Effexor. It did help but did increase my weight. Now at that time I might of gained 5 lbs which looking back is nothing !! This was the beginning of my introduction to SSRI's (anti depressants) and the effect they can have on your weight.
I ended up moving to Miami where my dad and step mom live to go to a community college. Not sure anyone knew what to do with me. I had no goals and basically didn't even know who "I" truly was. I failed miserably at school and ended up in Cleveland, Ohio where my mom moved in the mean time ( she is from the Cleveland area). I went to a community college and got a associates degree after many years. Then some how I got the self esteem to apply to a 4 year school thinking nursing would be a good career for me. I graduated with my BSN during which I had my first son and got married. I was about 28 years old.
My first son was born in Feb 2002 when I was 26. I gained 45 lbs during my first pregnancy. Although I had gotten married at the justice of the peace in Dec. 2001 my "true"wedding was in June of 2002. This was the first time I had EVER needed to lose weight. I lost all of my weight in 4 months weighing 133 lbs during my wedding. I also had terrible post part anxiety. I should be proud that when I look at my wedding pics I see this skinny beautiful bride. I am not proud. I spent 4 months losing all that weight for every one but ME !! I cared so much about what everyone else thought or would think about me that I was pretty much miserable and not enjoying the first few precious months of my sons life. My identity had always been based on my looks.
This began the battle with food and using it as a emotional clutch. I gained the same amount of weight with my second son in 2005 and lost all of my weight again (not for the right reasons) in about 8 months. Although I was skinny I was still not happy.
I could go on and on as I have lost the same 10-20 lbs over and over. I just recently gained 25 lbs being on Cymbalta. As of today I weigh 164 lbs which for ME is heavy. Everyone has THEIR number and looks different on everyone. I have done weight watchers, the cinch diet, Jenny Craig's etc etc.....I am sick of counting numbers or carbs vs protein and I just want to focus on fixing what I feel is the real problem for me. So right now I am watching what I eat...no number counting etc. and only eating when I am hungry. I did purchase the insanity videos ( my treadmill just broke) which should be arriving soon and I will be doing those and I love taking a yoga fusion class if i have the time. I have also committed to going to therapy weekly. I am hoping by fixing my anxiety issues and self esteem issues it will help with my emotional eating and my "hunger" for true happiness . Although my "number" goal is to be 145 lbs. My true goal is to love my self/life again and be the best mom I can be to the two most precious boys in my life !! Looking forward to sharing my journey with you .......
Piper
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